A Collection

Hello my friends!

It's been a while. Two reasons. 1. My schedule is filled up. 2. All of the things I want to share don't really require their own blog post. I'm just collecting all sorts of stuff and now I'm going to share them in this little collection. I haven't written the rest of this yet, but you may expect some sagas, vignettes, anecdotes, updates, lists, and whatever else comes out of this.

Let's start off with a fun one.

Caroline vs. Critters. 
Chapter 1. The Gecko Saga
    It all started my first week in Mango. The morning of my birthday, I was getting ready for work and saw a critter run right past me into the laundry room. I started and gave a little shriek. Thinking it was a mouse, I informed people who knew what to do, and was given a sticky mouse trap. For months, it just sat there collecting dust. The occasional spider or cockroach climbed on, but there were no further mouse sightings. Fast forward 3 months. I walk by and notice a large gecko on the trap. 
    Now I think it's necessary to describe the relationship I have with geckos. They range in size, but are generally smallish and are generally smoother than lizards. They live in houses and help eat insects. They run around on the walls and don't bother anybody- there's an occasional jump scare when you open your cabinet and see one scurrying away, but we just leave them alone and agree to co-exist. 
    The gecko on the mousetrap is there for about a day until one of my roommates got a glove and scooped the gecko off the trap and let it go outside. Unfortunately, it was too weak or injured from the trap, couldn't move, and died.
    But that was just the beginning. (Dun dun dun)

    Within the next couple of days, two more geckos apparently went on a suicide mission to revenge their leader and got themselves stuck on the trap! (At this point, I have something to confess. I was not in the mood to deal with this. I was working night shift and was tired and grossed out. I ignored the problem and avoided responsibility for too long.)
     Another day passes. Another gecko had made a valiant attempt to rescue the other two, but had gotten stuck.
     The next day. Two more joined the party. There were FIVE geckos trapped on the mousetrap.
     Finally. While I was at work, two of my roommates went in and witnessed a SIXTH gecko jump on! Enough was enough and the two of them were brave enough to scoop up the trap and take it outside to our guard. 
    The rest of the story is hearsay, but was apparently traumatic. The guard took the other 5 geckos into the back, and the rest is simply a mystery- but allegedly you could hear some thudding. 
     We did not put the trap back out.

The End.

Chapter 2. Caroline the Spider-Slayer

    Once upon a time, the hospital was nearly void of patients, and Caroline was bored. After doing her normal work, playing with her pediatric patient, scrubbing, wiping down, organizing, and cleaning for most of the morning, she had the bright idea to get rid of all the cobwebs in the corners of the wards.
    Armed with a rag atop a broom, she went to work. Quickly, she realized that there was the added challenge of nearly all the cobwebs still being occupied. What could've been perceived of as disgusting turned into a quest to defeat all of the spiders inhabiting the hospital.  The prey would sometimes leap to the ground and try to hide, but would not get far before being crushed by broom or foot. She started out counting her slaughtered foes, but lost count.
    The final tally was somewhere around 200ish. The enemy was defeated. The quest was fulfilled. And much fun was had. 

The End.

Even when it Hurts

If you've talked to me about this, you know that I care a lot about dying. After working on oncology for 3 years, I care a lot about how people experience the end of life.

I've watched a lot of kids die here. During a code, I usually jump into CPR and there have been a number of times where I have been the one to give the last breath or the last compression before we stop. And that hurts.

In a limited resource setting, there are a number of different illnesses or conditions where there is no way of treating a patient. There are currently no resources for a patient having a stroke or 3rd degree heart block or advanced liver cancer. And that hurts.

There are so many heartbreaking situations.

In the midst of this, the doctors that I work with here are so filled with the love of God for the people in their care, that even when it hurts, they still decide to care. Even when it hurts and they have to have hard conversations, they speak to the patients and their families with honesty and dignity. Even when it hurts to say that there's nothing we can do, there are chaplains there who deliver the Good News because they want to share the hope they have. It breaks my heart when we take all of the lines off of a dying baby and hand him to his mama so she can hold him as he passes away. It breaks a little further as we gather around her and the doctor prays, but we praise Him for His goodness and His faithfulness even when it hurts.

Behold Our God
   Today I had the incredible opportunity to go to a baptism. We piled in cars and drove out to a village where there has been a Bible study led by some of the hospital employees and chaplains. When we arrived, there were a whole bunch of people under a tree singing and dancing. We prayed together, and then started walking towards the river. The line of people in a single file line stretched way down the road. As they walked, the people being baptized kept on singing. At the riverbank, a pastor gave a message which was translated into the local language and then those being baptized started lining up. 

   Baptisms can make me cry nearly any day, but today I found it extra powerful. Before I left the house this morning, I got a video from my mom from the Christmas concert at my home church with the whole choir and orchestra singing the song Behold Our God. We sing it frequently here, and it's become my theme song for this year. 
   As 30ish people publicly declared their love for the Lord, that song was running through my head. Then that thing happened when all your thoughts mix together and I thought about the people back home singing, 'come let us adore Him', and the people in the hot sun on the riverbank singing praises in a language I can't understand, and the choir in heaven celebrating each life that comes to Him, and how even our most majestic forms of worship can't begin to do Him justice. I heard the story of how the Bible study started in this village which started with the tragedy of a little boy dying in our hospital. During his time there, his relative heard about Jesus and brought Him back with her. And then when the line was finished, I looked back up the riverbank, and saw most of the newly baptized wearing a new yellow cloth. As we walked back, they were still singing and I heard them chanting a familiar word: Alleluia. God be praised. Come let us adore Him. 

I'd love to make a full post about this next topic sometime, but I haven't found the thoughts or the words or the conclusions yet.

Sharing

There are up to 10 patients in a ward with nothing separating the beds. The patients are cared for by their family members, and I never thought I'd have to work so hard to identify which family member belongs to who. They sleep on mats on the floor and bring their meals inside and eat on the floor too. Kids run or crawl around the ward- at least halfway naked more often than not. 

And they share.

Water out of the same bowl. A meal including the whole ward. Village languages translated into French. Discharge instructions given through a complete stranger. Turns giving food the the woman there alone. Help and caring regardless of relation. Gifts given that are immediately shared with a neighbor. 

And now I'm asking, what is my role in this? Does giving ever become too much? When does sharing hurt? If I do share what I have, where do I draw the line? Should there be a line? Why don't they save? Why do I save so much? What would this level of sharing look like in America? 

I don't know a single answer. 

A List.
Of completely unrelated things that I still have left to say. 

1. This is my 14 year old friend S who was electrocuted and lost his right hand. His other arm might need amputation as well. He is in the process of getting a prosthetic. Most importantly, he's open to hearing about Jesus. Pray for him. 


2. I saw a cockroach in my bathroom today and calmly picked up the closest heavy item and smashed it without hesitation. Contrast this with the first time that happened and it took a 10 minute standoff with much shrieking and flinching while standing on top of the tub. Progress.

3. Here's a video of my newest project/hobby. These are kids who are staying in our cuisine. The cuisine is basically a building that has divided areas where people can sleep. There is running water and some places where people can build a fire for food. It's mostly there for patients who have been discharged but still need wound care or medications, patient families, or patients who come from a long ways away. They can be there for anywhere from a couple days to 8 months. A couple of people have ministries in the cuisine, but one of them is leaving this week, and I get to help continue her ministry with the kids. Basically, I get to play games with them whenever I can. It's a pretty sweet deal. 

4. Riding a unicycle in a skirt is nearly impossible.

5. I realized recently that I haven't given a single update about my work with the students. Whoops.  For about 7 weeks now, I've gotten to work with students in the clinical setting in addition to working as a nurse. I love working and teaching in that setting, and I love the students. They are so smart and have such great hearts for nursing and their patients. It's been encouraging for me, and I've learned a lot from them. Also, it really helps my French. Please pray because there are seeds that have been sown and tended and watered and are growing. These students are part of the future of the hospital, and they have so much potential.

6. I love and miss y'all. Have a Merry Christmas!

Because they haven't heard,

Caroline