I'm not a new grad, not yet a proficient

Hehehe. My title was clever. My clever moments are so far and few in between, I have to point them out to you to make sure you don't miss it.

So. I have been through classroom orientation and a couple of weeks on my floor. Goodness gracious it's great. I recognize that it's really early still and I have a lot of time to change my mind, but so far, this floor is fitting me like a glove. Here's a few reasons how oncology nursing is perfect for me:
- I am using my nursing skills
-I am able to support people emotionally when they're having a really bad day.
-There is tons of education for the patients.
- I have the time to look at the whole person and meet their needs.
-A lot of the patients are on the unit for an extended amount of time or come back at another point in time, so I can develop a trusting relationship with them and their families.
-There is the possibility of visible, tangible improvement that I can see from day to day. This is so encouraging for a nurse.
-There is a ton of information for me to learn about cancer. It's not simple.
-8 hour shifts leave me enough energy to still accomplish things the day I work.
-Day shift is bliss.
-Most patients are very motivated to get better. This makes them easier to work with.
-Sometimes my patient's situations are heartbreaking, but because I believe in Christ, I can come from a place of hope and offer that to my patients.
-I get to use critical thinking and think outside of the box.

All is going well. If you're the praying sort, I am currently looking at options for apartments/living situations for when my lease runs out. It's a headache. Thanks!

-C-

How to Swiftie

Hello everyone! This is Caroline AKA a die-hard Swiftie. After purchasing tickets 8 months ago, I got to attend a Taylor Swift concert with my bestie AKA my sister. I'm sure all of you are jealous of me, and you have every right to be because we had the best time. I am going to kindly give all of you a tutorial on how to attend a Taylor Swift concert so that you might have a chance at living the dream like me.

P.S. This is more pictures than I have ever taken in a single day. I drove myself nuts.

Step 1. Check the weather report. Plan your outfit accordingly.


Step 2. Double check that you have your tickets, details, times, and locations correct


Step 3. Start your day with a healthy breakfast (poptart not pictured)


Step 4. Listen to TayTay's opening artists on repeat. Memorize their hit song so that you can sing along.


Step 5. Help your sister pick out the appropriate concert outfit. Try on at least 4. Debate over makeup/hair/shoes to wear and be as high maintenance as possible. (All of this while blasting the entire 1989 cd)


Step 6. Selfies!


Step 7. Write on your hands in true Taylor fashion. Instagram her and secretly hope that she notices you.


Step 8. Check the forecast again (another forecast at 3pm stated that there was 100% chance of thunderstorms during the concert. I was too depressed to get that picture.)


Step 9, More beautiful music from the opening acts.


Step 10. Go back and listen to all your old Swiftie favorites.


Step 11. Find a nostalgic/inspirational/appropriate lyrics and write all over yourself. (the purpose of this is because you are pretending to be Taylor. For those of you not fortunate enough to be one of her biggest fans, in previous tours she would write different song lyrics down her arm for every show)


Step 12. Kiss the feet of your amazing parents who are willing to drive you into the city so you don't have to pay the ridiculous parking or find a train/bus in the wee hours of the morning after the concert.


Step 13. Get to the stadium! More selfies! Security! Get your commemorative Taylor Swift light-up bracelet!


Step 14. Take it all in.


Step 15. Get to your seats and realize that they're not in the nosebleed section. You can actually see!


Step 16. Last selfie. I promise.



Step 17. Fall in love with the opening acts.

 

Step 18. Try to imitate Haim's faces.

Step 19. Take a moment to be thankful because the entire night was 75 degrees without a cloud in the sky. 

Step 20. FREAK. OUT because Queen Taylor came onstage. Oh you guys. They finished setting up and the entire stadium went dark and quiet. Then the music started and everyone's bracelets started lighting up. People were screaming. Then she was on stage. People went berserk. All she had to do was pose looking over her shoulder and 55,000 people would go crazy. I stopped taking a bunch of pictures because I wanted to live in the moment and not spend the entire time on my phone. Also, the glare was bad. I did get a few pictures though :)

      

The third picture is all of the glowy bracelets. They would light up with the beat. The last picture is Taylor on her runway which lifted up into the air and spun around. 

A few highlights from the show. 

-A remix of Love Story on the elevated runway

-Guest star Andy Grammar singing Honey I'm Good

-The first time she got onstage and sang Welcome to New York

-Everyone dancing during Shake It Off

-Her telling us that we could call her TayTay

-Cute videos between songs featuring her cats

-Incredible dancing/ special effects including fireworks

-Taylor being Taylor

Step 21. Fight the madness/traffic of 55,000 people trying to leave on the same street along with 20,000 parents trying to find and pick up their tween. 

Step 22. Incorporate Taylor lyrics into your everyday life for the next couple of weeks. 

"Today was a fairytale" "I was enchanted to meet you" "I had the best day with you (and Callie) today" "This night is sparkling, don't you let it go"

Life unfolding

Life, now, was unfolding before me, constantly and visibly, like the flowers of summer that drop fanlike petals on eternal soil.”
―Roman Payne, Rooftop Soliloquy

*please read in a slightly flawed British accent*

   My good people, faithful readers, and kind strangers: Life is a continual feast. Indeed, there is so much good happening around me, I can hardly take it all in. This summer in particular has been a constant stream of special moments betwixt exciting events, and changes that are clearly God-sent. This afternoon, I came across a list of quotes about summer that allowed me to reflect on the summer and how it has been full of blessings. The one at the beginning of this post put me into a poetic mood- hence the accent.

    For nearly a fortnight, I have been working at my new job. On the first day on my floor I thought I would have the collywobbles, but instead I was calm and confident. Although I have been a nurse for nearly 10 months, there are so many small things to learn that I didn't attempt much on the first day. For example, how do you page the doctors? How to make an outside call? Where does one keep the IV tubing? What are the proper procedures to draw blood? Where shall I put my lunch?

   Today, I was on the floor again and with most of the rubbish out of the way, I was able to actually feel like a nurse. It was smashing. I felt like I had the time and resources to truly care for my patient in a way that I wasn't able to before. I'm hesitant to say that it will stay like this because I've only been on the floor for a couple of days, but I am very optimistic about this floor. Oncology patients and their families are truly special people. They require a special kind of compassion and care, but in return, a majority of them are truly thankful and appreciative of the work we do. Stories and more moments to come.

    In addition to starting a new job, my family moved into their beautiful new home. Earlier this year, we thought we were moving, but everything fell through. Also earlier this year, I had a different job interview for a position I thought I really wanted, but it didn't work out. As I look at this summer, I see God's hand at work. Those other houses didn't work out because this new house is incredible and where we are supposed to be. My other job opportunity didn't work out because I am fairly sure I was supposed to get my new position. I am gobsmacked by God's faithfulness. I heard once a quote that I am sure I will butcher, but it went something like, "If you knew what God's plan was for you, that's exactly what you would want too."
   
     As I look ahead at the upcoming months, there's still uncertainty with where I will live and grad school. However, I am so blown away by how God has provided, I only worry about it when I forget that He's there (I wish I could say I never worry about it, but that isn't true). I am learning more about trust- things might not always work out the way I would like them to, but I know that my God is Sovereign.

Here's a few other happenings from this summer: some already passed and some yet to come
-Wedding in Wisconsin
-Broadway in Chicago musical
-Trip to Michigan with BFF
-Bike rides on the beach
-Bubble soccer
-Taylor Swift Concert!!!!!!!
-Camping trip
-Fondue
-Start grad school
-Girl's getaway with mom and sis
-Birthdays
-Blueberry picking
-Beach days with friends
-All of the other everyday things that make life exciting

   At the end of each day, I am so knackered, I sleep like a babe. It's not the "I feel so groggy and gross and tired that I won't feel good for the next few days" kind of tired. It's the "I had such a good day that I left it all out there" kind of tired. It feels good.

Thanks for reading! Here's one more quote I found today.

“All in all, it was a never to be forgotten summer — one of those summers which come seldom into any life, but leave a rich heritage of beautiful memories in their going — one of those summers which, in a fortunate combination of delightful weather, delightful friends and delightful doing, come as near to perfection as anything can come in this world.”

Keep it movin'

Heya!

The girl writing this blog has slept during and through the night for the past 10 days, has eaten actual meals, and is feeling fantastic! This past week, I finished up my last job, helped move my family into a new house, enjoyed a beautiful holiday weekend complete with barbeques, frisbee golf, and biking, and started a new job. So far, there's no sign of slowing down.

This is a picture that I sneaked in during orientation today. We were getting fitted for respirators, so people came behind us and blew bitter gas into a little hole in the creepy cone of shame thing. If we tasted the gas, it meant the mask wasn't working and we needed a different kind. Felt like something you'd see go terribly wrong in a horror movie.

One of my last days at my old hospital, I had this very old patient. I'd walk in the room and ask if he needed anything. He'd look at me and shake his head. I'd ask him if he was in pain, and he'd nod. Once his meal tray came up, he put on the call light and I went in the room to help him. This is how the conversation went. "Come here. Sit me up. Bring that closer. Open that. Where's my salt? Put it in the soup. What's in there? Cover that back up. Give me my fork. Open the milk. Warm that up. That's all." 

Because I try to be a nice person, I treated him kindly and with respect and dignity. However, it wasn't like I was rejoicing when I walked into the room. Then, at the end of shift, I walked in to give report to the next nurse. I walked in, the patient smiled at me and said, "There she is! That's my girl!" I was kind of taken aback.... If I had built up rapport with the patient throughout the day, I would have teased him or said something sassy. For this guy however, I didn't really know what to say cause I sure didn't think that I was 'his girl'. But you know what? I'll take it. 

You guys, nurses have to have a twisted sense of humor. So much crazy happens that if we don't laugh about it, we will become depressed, cynical human beings. This story isn't really that funny, but this patient came in at 3:45 in the morning during one of my last night shifts. He had tons of what we'll call 'personality'. He was SO loud and SO blunt about his needs that my coworkers and I found ourselves laughing silently in the nurses station at nearly everything he said. The nurse asked him if he ever felt depressed and he announced "I feel happy ALL of the time". The nurse addressed him as Mr. ______ and he nearly shouted "You leave out the mister!" Then he made a crude joke. Then he started talking about the CT scan that he had received. He didn't know what it was called so he started trying to draw it in the air. As I'm writing this, I'm not laughing, but at the time, he could have passed as the winner of a stand up comedy show. My point is, give anyone who works midnights some slack. It's rough. 

Orientation so far has been good. A lot of it is all the basic things that the hospital requires you to talk about, so it's a lot of lecture. The rest of this week is more orientation and then I have my first day on the floor next Monday! 

More soon!

-C-