When I blog or write nearly anything, a majority of the time is spent sitting in front of a blank screen, typing a few words or sentences, and then erasing them. I'll brainstorm ideas or research topics....I'll flip back and forth between Facebook and my email cause I'm distracted.... I've written entire drafts of speeches and then completely erased them. My final drafts are not always that great, but I can assure you that it took a while to get there. Once I get going, it's much smoother. The initial jump is the hardest.
I think that the initial jump is actually the hardest for a lot of things. Starting a project, initiating a conversation, beginning your exercise routine, or committing to a decision takes more effort than actually just doing it.
This past week, I took the second real jump into planning for Togo. The first jump was sending out support letters. Standing at the post office with a box of letters freaked me out as I realized that it would be much more difficult to back out if 100+ letters were floating around telling people about my vision. I jumped anyway.
My second jump was going to short term field prep with ABWE in Pennsylvania. Together with about 35 other people, I attended a 3 day training seminar to prepare us for serving in different countries across the world. Here are my main takeaways.
1. ABWE seems to take wonderful care of its missionaries. From the gift bags waiting for us at the hotel to the health insurance seminar to the dessert with our directors to the careful preparation for each and every seminar....I felt valued. I didn't realize how important this was until I realized how many details and planning go into an 8 month trip. Without ABWE, I would be so lost, overwhelmed, and unprepared. To those of you who are worry warts or see the glass as half empty, don't worry. I'm in good hands :)
2. It was a wonderful revelation to discover how bonded you can be to people who have similar goals or visions. If you walk into a room and know that everyone there is on a similar journey, you can talk about things and relate to them on a deeper and more meaningful level than you would with someone else you just met. Realistically, I probably won't see most of them ever again, but I am so grateful for the relationships I made. I was so encouraged, and I'll be praying for them as we all go on our separate paths.
3. I am Type A (I didn't learn that at field prep. It is a very obvious fact). Togo is not. I believe that this will be the biggest culture shock. I will go to work expecting to get stuff done. I'll have my to-do list and a plan for the day. I will start talking to someone and they might want to ask me about my well-being. We might have a long conversation about their children and where I got my skirt and how their pet antelope is doing and how I am adjusting to the heat before we get anything done. This is not how America works, but it is something that I am so excited to experience. I know I may feel frustrated, but prioritizing relationships over efficiency is definitely something I could work on. Market day is not going to be like grocery shopping. It'll be the social event of the week where talking to the vendors is more important than the food. *deep breath* It's gonna be an amazing experience.
4. After going to training, I feel like everything is more real. The plans I'm making are more tangible. I knew that training would either freak me out or get me really excited. It managed to do both, but in a good way. I will hopefully have a concrete departure date soon and get final clearance from everyone. I'm getting ready.
I'm almost funded! Finances should not be holding me back at all. Thank you so much to all of you who have given generously and shown me so much support and love.
Hopefully more details coming soon! I love you all!
Because they haven't heard,
-C-
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