You Give and Take Away

I'm posting this after a 12 hour shift, so if my grammar or spelling is poor, you'll know why.

I had a crazy night last night. It was really busy right off the bat. I don't think I sat down to take a breath and regroup until 1am. (However, I think I handled a busy night rather well which I'm kind of proud of.) After I had caught up on everything and was able to set my mind straight, I had an encounter that I'd like to share with you.

   A while ago, I worked three nights in a row (36+ hours) with the most difficult patient I've ever had. Not only was he very insistent and particular about his care, but he was unkind at times and he was medically very complicated. He was an extremely sick man and we were doing absolutely everything we could for him, but he was really discouraged and frustrated with his progress. Every day when I gave report, I would apologize to the day nurse because I felt like he was such a heavy load. During my time with him, I had the opportunity to pray with him multiple times. The day after my 3rd night, he ended up going to the ICU. Although he was the most difficult patient I've ever had, I cared about this man and wanted to know what his outcome was.
    Fast forward to last night. I was sitting at the nursing station and found out that this patient had passed away that evening.
    The next minute, one of my patient puts on his call light. I go into the room for some small thing and at 3 in the morning, I end up having a 20 minute conversation with this guy about how he fell in love with his wife the moment he saw her on the dance floor 67 years ago. He told me all about his sons, his business, and some of the most important points of his life. He had been the hospital for over a month and was finally getting ready to go back home, so he was ecstatic. He told me that I was a kind and intelligent nurse and then muttered that I was his favorite.
   As I walked out of that room, it hit me just how ridiculously dichotomous my job is. It blew my mind for a minute and then I moved on and finished my shift. Then, on my way home, the song Blessed Be Your Name came on the radio. When it hit the bridge, "You give and take away" I thought of these two moments that came back to back and both touched me in powerful ways. Then I knew I had to blog about it. It's a crazy thing when a nurse can be in tears one moment, walk into a different room, and start laughing right away. I hope this encounter gives you a glimpse of the nursing life.
Love to all,

-C-

BTW, you all are really bad at commenting on my posts.